I had never known what being strong meant before you
And maybe that is why holding your weak hands in the steady ones of my own,
In this way too familiar hospital room
Grants me the serenity to finally let go.
As you sigh in your painful sleep,
I think back to the time
You came to rescue
When life pushed too hard,
When my own skin became so
foreign.
The same fingers wrapped around me back then,
Which are now tender and ready to rest
That used to shake me out of my trance
when I used to travel into the world of nothingness,
Where I used to stay quiet,
Only to scream in my head that
I am nothing but
small
soft
and weak.
At times when I was no longer myself,
And turned into water
You held me up from drowning within myself.
When darkness used to come over,
As days turned into nights
And seconds turned into minutes
And anger turned into self pity,
When I used to crumble,
You jumped in to put me back together every single time.
When I used to forget to feel the pain
Because the hurt had been there for too long
And my heart had grown accustomed to the constant pain,
You taught me how to rebuilt and reset.
You taught me how to press pause
Only to press resume again.
When I had given up,
because the burden had become too hard for me to carry,
You taught me that everyone feels pain but
We are not meant to carry it forever.
We are meant to hold it so closely,
That over time we become certain that
Pain belongs to us just
As much we belong to pain.
Countless times, when life’s claws had been around my neck,
You were there to remind me that
I am still here.
That I am a fighter and
I am a survivor.
And maybe that was your role,
Maybe you were only sent to save me.
Maybe you were sent to help me love myself,
And make me feel like at home in my own skin.
I don’t have a lot to say,
But if I never see you again,
I want to thank you for saving me.
I want to thank you for showing me how to find the light
So whenever the world gets dark again,
I can overcome any shadow that falls upon my path.
I want to thank you for forcing me
To dance to this broken melody,
Because it has now mastered into my life line.
I want to thank you for teaching me how to be gentle and soft
And teaching me to be everything that this world urges me not to be.
I want to thank you for dropping me off
At the right exit,
And for that I can now find my own way around.
I want to thank you,
For making a difference,
And I am now ready to take it from here.
When I initially started writing this piece, I had my grandma in mind. The thought occurred to me during our weekly FaceTime when she mentioned her weak health and how I owe her a visit because from here life is uncertain for her. The idea of her getting old and me eventually losing her threw me into a frenzy and this piece was born. As my writing progressed throughout, I found myself reflecting on more than just one person. The “you” in this poem is not limited to one person but to everyone who has helped me hold on to this deary life and stay sane. For me, this poem has transformed into something very important, that I will always hold close to my heart as it was a reflection upon the idea of how I would react if I lost someone important.
June 4, 2018 at 1:52 PM
Dear Zohra,
I think this is a beautiful piece and you were able to bring across the feelings of need and thankfulness for the people that help keep us sane in a world where it can really be difficult to at times. I also liked how you mentioned that this was originally sparked by your grandma and how it grew to be something for not just her, but everyone that has helped you in your reflection.
There were only small things you could improve on like proper word choice to not make your poem sound awkward. For example, in the line “Only to press resume again.”, I think it would have been best to use the word “play” instead of “resume”.
As always, amazing work and I love how you could see and feel your growth as a writer from the beginning of the semester.
Love,
Kayla
June 5, 2018 at 11:33 AM
Dear Zohra,
I can say with no hesitation that this is one of the most beautiful poetry pieces I have read this semester. Your poetry writing skills are incredible! The emotion throughout this piece was real, and I could really feel it as a reader. i was hooked in right from the beginning and couldn’t stop reading till the end. I found it interesting that the piece was written for your grandmother, and I agree, it could be used to describe plenty of beautiful relationships.
I have nothing that I would recommend for improvement. Your poem flows perfectly and is incredibly well written.
I definitely have to go through your blog and read more of your stuff!
Noor
June 10, 2018 at 5:07 PM
Dear Zohra,
This poem held great insight and gave a deeper meaning to the relationships we are in and how,sometimes, we fail to be grateful. Your realization of this near the end seemed quite inspirational for other readers to follow in your footsteps. It is amazing to see how you considered that dwelling on the past will only cause grief and that there holds much more meaning in just having gratitude.
My only recommendation would be to just read through your piece for any GUMPS. In the line “Pain belongs to us just As much we belong to pain”, you forgot to put a second ‘as’ in front of ‘we’.
Other than those minute details, your poetry is amazing, and I hope you carry this with you as you enter grade 12.